It can feel like you’re controlled by your thoughts and emotions, but what if it can be the other way around?
We all know what it’s like to be thinking about something we don’t want to be thinking about. Maybe you can’t stop thinking about that work you need to get done or that ex you really need to get over — that can cause a lot of stress and anxiety. No matter what you do, you can’t just stop thinking about something or stop your mind from racing…can you?
As it turns out, there are certain practices that, if done correctly and consistently, can allow you to have more control over your thoughts. The reason we think in the way that we do is because of learned patterns, but by changing those patterns through careful focus exercises like meditation, you can actually alter the way you think!
In this post, expect to learn the answers to these questions:
Our minds are a part of our bodies, so why is it that we can’t control what we think about as well as we can control our arms and legs? And more so, how do we find ourselves controlled by what we subconsciously think?
Well, according to The Predictive Brain Hypothesis, the brain develops the way it thinks based on the experiences one has had in their life. Your mind tries to understand the world around you and predict what will happen next based on what you know has happened in the past. We’re constantly collecting new information about the world every day, and so we’re constantly developing a more nuanced understanding of the world.
This means that if we have a significant amount of experiences with trauma, abuse, or other negative things, our perception of the world will be shaped accordingly. A traumatic past will result in a more negative view of the world. In this way, you can develop stress and anxiety as learned habits.
Your thoughts are really what control your perception of the world, so they also control the way you feel. According to this theory, your thinking all the time is your brain constantly updating your perception of the world.
Negative thinking can be a result of your thoughts, which is why you might not be able to stop thinking about certain things. If a person has had a significant impact on your life, then you’ll think about them even if you shouldn’t. The same goes for events and ideas.
So now that we understand how your thoughts affect and change you, how can you learn to change and control your thoughts?
The way you think is dictated by patterns and habits that you’ve developed throughout your life. This is the reason why we can become stuck in certain harmful ways of thinking that negatively affect your mental health. These habits can be deeply ingrained in us, so they’re not easy to get rid of by any means. Many people who try and change these patterns end up falling back into them time and time again, but it’s far from impossible to change the way you think.
Here are the best strategies for changing your thoughts based on research:
What we focus on in our daily lives has a huge impact on how we feel and what we think about. Usually, we don’t put a whole lot of thought into what we tend to focus on, but if you’re looking to change your thought patterns, it may be time to do an experiment.
When you wake up tomorrow, try to keep in mind what you notice first when you’re presented with any kind of information throughout the day. When you see an image, what part of it do you notice first? When someone tells you something, what sticks with you the most? When something happens to you, do you tend to focus on the negative things or the positive things? Let me give you an example:
Let’s say you’re working at a job that you’re not happy with, but you don’t want to quit because you are familiar with the job and can do the work well. One day, you make a mistake and your boss decides to fire you. Assuming that money isn’t an issue for you, what is the first thing that would come to mind if you were in this situation?
If the first thing you’re thinking about is how inconvenient and stressful the situation would be, then you might have a negative focus. You tend to notice the negative in things before you notice the positive. If the first thing you’re thinking about is that you’re not stuck in a job you don’t like anymore and you’re now open to new opportunities, then you might have a positive focus. People with a positive focus tend to be much happier than those who have a negative focus, so this state of mind is much more desirable.
Having a negative focus may be the result of a difficult life full of trauma and anxiety, but though this mindset can be deeply ingrained, you can change it if you practice being mindful of your focus. If you would normally be caught up in the negative aspects of a situation, try to think about what is positive about the situation. A positive person can typically find a silver lining to anything, and so if you’re actively seeking out positive and good things to think about, then eventually your mind will become more likely to have a positive focus.
Meditation is regarded as one of the best ways to undo bad thinking habits. When we are stuck in our thoughts, we are essentially pulling ourselves out of the current moment to focus on past information and worry about what will happen in the future. Meditation is the opposite of that. When we meditate properly, we clear our mind of thoughts and focus on what we’re feeling in the moment. Close your eyes, get into a comfortable position, try to clear your mind, and focus on the sound of your breathing. Doing this will allow you to ground yourself in the present moment and combat harmful thoughts.
Another form of meditation that will help you control your thoughts is mindfulness meditation. Mindfulness involves observing and identifying your own thoughts and feelings. When you’re overthinking or falling into another harmful thought pattern, try taking a breath and evaluate these thoughts. What are you thinking about, and why are you thinking about them? Why are certain thoughts bothering you? Once you understand why you are thinking harmful thoughts, you can take steps to change them.
Perhaps the best form of meditation to help stop harmful thoughts is open-awareness meditation. This form of meditation is when you simply allow your feelings and thoughts to come and go without acting on them or trying to suppress them. If your mind gets used to not getting worked up over your usual flow of thoughts, then you will slowly but surely unlearn those harmful thought patterns.
If you’d rather take a more medical approach to changing your thought patterns, then there are plenty of therapies you can use to help your mind develop more healthy and positive thoughts. Some of these therapies include
Many, if not most, people will experience some form of overthinking, and if not, then chances are your mind could still benefit from being able to stay in the moment. In our day to day lives we’re forced to worry about the future and face the consequences of our past constantly, so it becomes extremely easy to get stuck in our heads.
Changing your thoughts goes farther than just changing what you think about, it involves creating healthy thinking habits that improve the way you function every day!
